Comment Contest Numero Uno

FLORHAM PARK, N.J. (AP)—Jets cornerback Antonio Cromartie used an expletive to describe union and NFL leaders Monday in his latest profanity-filled rant. “You’ve got our head union reps acting like an (expletive), and they got their guys acting like them (expletive),” Cromartie told reporters.

Rules: Come up with the funniest comment/reaction possible on this news story, a la Barstool's Caption Contests, except with a story, not a picture or video. If you haven't seen one, here's an example.

"All this swearing is setting a bad example for his 9 kids."

Can you do better? COMMENT BELOW!
  

Ramifications of Savard Injury

There was a time this season when Boston Bruins fans had to question whether Marc Savard would ever be back to his old self -- if he even got back on the ice at all -- after suffering a vicious head injury from a Matt Cooke hit in March of last year. After an attempt to come back during the Eastern Conference Semifinals against Philadelphia last season, Savard missed a large portion of time to start this season as he battled several post-concussion symptoms. He made his anticipated return on December 2nd, but it was clear that he hadn't really found his groove yet on the ice. Linemates Milan Lucic and Nathan Horton both went ice cold, and the Savard line was suddenly, for all intents and purposes, the third line on the roster. But lately, Savvy had begun to find his stride and display his increasing comfort level. We began to see the brilliant, playmaking side of #91 that fans remembered from years past. Couple that with the Bruins success, and things were starting to become very promising once again. And then, in an instant, our uncertainty took the wheel again.

The Rest of the ULTYs

Originally, the plan was to announce the ULTY Awards one at a time and glorify the winners. We announced the co-champions of the first ever award -- Most Valuable Commenter -- earlier this month. Well, after all this slacking and delaying, I just want to get these awards finished. They'll be better next time. But you're all anxious to find out, so I don't want to keep you any longer. Ladies and gentlemen, your 2010 ULTY Winners.

Through the Looking Glass

I'm not making any Lost references despite the title of this post. The only connection between Lost and last night's game -- and the whole season, for that matter -- is that things didn't add up, boggled my mind, and ended in a manner unlike the majority of the sample size. Regardless, it's time to take a step back in the aftermath and look at this Patriots season in retrospect.

It had the makings of our glory days. It wasn't like the '07 team. This team spread the ball out on offense. Made plays on defense. Protected the football. Made sound decisions. Played mistake-free football. Where did it all go on Sunday night? How could such a shocker go down in such an epically disastrous fashion? In the end, the upset that shocked America may not have been such a stunning defeat after all.